unspoken

do you have something that you want to say, but you know you never will?

I refuse to believe that you don't.

I'm going to be honest, there is a lot I want to say that no one will ever hear. Sometimes I don't even turn my computer on when I come in the room because, let's be real, it's pretty easy to fall into the trap of "status updates" that blast the 'world' with the inner workings of our brains.

for the sake of self control, or perhaps respect, or even for the sake of fear, I know that I will never write or speak some of the things on my heart (or mind...or whatever it is that makes me want to smash a mirror on the ground).

this post is for all those unspoken words. hopefully they were offered to the Lord and replaced with words that reflect Him.

[about the author:
not perfect
gets angry
knows there is a bigger picture]

I Have Learned

I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them;

I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back;

I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I’ve learned that you can get by on charm, for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something;

I’ve learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I’ve learned that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry.

I’ve learned that maturity had more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I’ve learned that your family won’t always be there for you.

I’ve learned that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while.

I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I’ve learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I’ve learned that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I’ve learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you.

I’ve learned that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings and standing up for what you believe.

(anonymous author)

hello NY!

"back at the yack" was the most common facebook status this past week as we all moved back into the dorms...so now here we are, second day of classes over and it's the weekend! halleluiah because I am sick and I just need to sleep.

This semester I am taking nutrition, anatomy and physiology, new testament, global literature, and human growth and development. Sixteen credits in all, more than last semester but I think that since I am used to the process now it'll be a little easier to stay on top of things.

other than already being sick of cafeteria food and knowing I should be doing homework right now...not much to report. for now!

2012 :)

When I think about the fact that it is the year 2012, I sorta understand what adults mean when they say that time starts to fly by as you get older. I think about how twelve years ago I was a little girl anticipating a double digits birthday, staring in toy store windows at dolls that I wanted for Christmas, and just discovering that boys could be oh so annoying but oh so fun to play with...

Twelve years later...my jaw wants to drop, I want to scream, and I just can't believe all that happens in a little over a decade. Or that I am less than six years away from being done with a formal education...never thought that day would come. Adulthood becomes scary at about this moment. Yet also exciting!

I have less than a week of break left before I head back to Nyack for my second semester. Honestly, contemplating last semester I can't say I am excited to go back, but I am trusting that there are new things in store these next few months so I am eager for change and new things!

To recap last semester, it was hard. It was stressful. It wasn't what I expected from my first semester at a Christian college. But it was eye opening. And I believe than challenges are opportunities to strengthen faith and grow. So I am thankful.

Other than going to school at Nyack this spring semester, I don't know what 2012 holds. I don't think I'll be coming back to Colorado for spring break, so I could be going four to six months without seeing my family...a big challenge! Summer plans are still under prayer.

My prayer for this year: