Christmas music shall STILL play!

I just detest that the radio stations stop playing Christmas music on the day after Christmas. I will still be playing it weeks into the new year, that's for sure.

Our days here in Illinois with family have been very fun. It's the first time in four years we have all been together. For two days straight we have been eating like vacuums. There isn't a scale in sight so I'll have to wait a few more days to see how much I gained. I can tell you one thing, though, that I don't fit into my pants any better. I still need a dang belt!

Tonight we are going to the zoo in St. Louis. I haven't been there in...gosh, ages! At least a decade. It's snowy and cold but the Christmas lights are up tonight.


Me and a black and white calf!

Haha, my uncle just won $100 from a scratch ticket! He just sat there and announced it quite calmly...

well after this post I am not getting on the computer for the rest of the trip. I thought I was getting away from internet for a while! Cheerio!

Merry Christmas!!

I am leaving tomorrow to spend Christmas with my extended family. In case I don't get to get on and say this on the actual day...

Happy birthday Jesus! Merry Christmas to all!

Have you ever really stopped to listen? Sometimes I wonder if everyone only hears what they want to hear. Honestly, I think it takes lots of patience and training to become a good listener. But then again, what is a good listener? Someone who will sit and stare intently at your face as you talk about who knows what...ocassionally interjecting a "mmm" or "yeah" to make it seem like they are really engaged?

Gaaaaah. Sometimes I get so frustrated. Not only with other people, about 99% who don't care about a thing I have to say. And with myself, because I believe they don't care. So I don't talk. I don't say what is on my mind. And then I get mad at others for not listening. It's just the recurring circle.

Not Far Apart - Ryan Kelly - Official Video

I'm not dead but I like this song... :)

New Directions

No, I am not copying from Glee. I thought up the title on my own and THEN realized I was sorta copying...

Well folks, I am taking a new direction. Turning off a road that has lasted what seems to be way to long and starting a new part of life. I am desperately trying at the moment to sound passionate and contemplative, but mostly I am too tired to even think about it all. And I don't think it will hit me that I am officially done with high school. Probably because I never felt like I was in high school.

I started out my 12-year-long journey of school at home with my mommy. She is one of those amazing women who dedicated 12 years of her life to giving me an amazing education. Not to mention she got a bit of one herself! I am so so so thankful for a mom who actually made learning a first priority in our lives. School was never trumped by anything else--we were a die hard home school family because it really was SCHOOL at home. She taught me how to write effectively, and it is thanks to her that I can easily pass any writing course now. She incorporated Biblical truths and principals into our learning. Gosh, she just really invested so much into my education.

I spent my first two years of high school doing an online school, then. Still sort of home schooling but the work was way harder than anything Mom or probably most regular schools can come up with. These two years really prepared me for the next year and a half. I breezed through my first semester of 11th grade. Which happened to be my first semester in a public school. The second semester I went to our community college (my high school paid for it) and that is what I did this semester as well. Because I took college courses for dual college and high school credits I gained enough credit to graduate this December, which I have done! Today I took my very last final and now I have some relief from the stresses of school.

I can't believe that 12 years of my life has passed so quickly...and yet so slowly. It's so crazy that for over a decade my life has been so varied, changing, and....just....life-ish! I feel like I am almost finally waking up. That sounds cheesy, I know. I don't know how to express the feelings I have, though, when I think that the chains called "school" that have bound me, in essence, for the last four years are sort of gone. I tell you no lies when I say that all throughout high school, the main priority in my life has been school. Homework. Getting good grades. It has become so apparent to me this last semester how I have so easily pushed other things to the wayside as I focused so heavily on school!

Now I know that I still have years left of education. And even after schooling and college I hope I can still be learning. But Lord knows that after a year of doing college work but having to tell people I am still in high school can be more than a bit frustrating!

So here is to freedom! And to a new direction. May it glorify God even more than any road I've ever been on.

The Voyage

So last night was The Night! I got to go see Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader. If I didn't make so much money babysitting on Fridays I would have gone Thursday midnight with some friends to see it, but alas...I am a poor kid who needs money for Africa. ;) So I called a friend to see if she wanted to go on Saturday night. As is so her, she invited everyone else she knew...anywho, I was only going for the movie so I didn't care who came.

My thoughts on the movie are as follows:
It doesn't really follow the book to a T. I mean, it follows the story, but they add in a really major element that is not in the book. And they leave some key parts out of the movie that are in the book. For example, Caspian and the star princess!! GRRR! Let's just say, no development of that relationship at all.
There was a bit of cheesiness...mostly in the screenplay, some, "No duh, Lucy. Thanks for stating the obvious" moments.
Eustace was actually one of my favorite characters. The boy who played him did a terrific job and I really do wish they'd continue the series with him (and Jill).
Despite all the little (or big) glitches and "Whaaaaa?!" moments I am a sucker for the epic endings. I cry every time at the end of Prince Caspian. And I cried at the end of this one...when you see it, right at the part before the kids go back to the real world. I just cried and cried. I almost cry thinking about it.
All in all, I love the stories. I love Narnia.
Oh, P.S., Aslan had some dialogue that made me VERY proud of Fox for putting it in there. You'll know what I mean when you hear it.

Whoa!

Oh my goodness something weird just happened! My laptop is on my lap and the muscle in my leg just moved so much that it lifted my laptop up almost an inch and then back down! Creeeeepy!

So I am officially done with French and History classes now! For French we performed our final skit today. It went fairly well and I got a 97% so...yaay! And in history I got a 93% on my midterm....haha, wow. Totally was not expecting that good of a grade. All I have left is chemistry and then I am done forever! Or at least for a little less than a year...

Nothing else interesting to say as of yet. Oh, who's excited for NARNIA????!!?!

Celtic Thunder Christmas - Winter Wonderland

The Healing Heart

The Healing Heart
by Gary Hess



Shattered heart forced to heal
as greatness unveils thine soul.
Hope whispered in the distance,
to recover thine lost love.

'Tis night brings tender passing,
healing thine soul with glorious blunder.
Caus' not one or two,
but dissipated nights of dreams.

Sadness comes to end,
happiness conquered hate.
Love sprouting -- sadness shrinking,
hope has come again.

December 2

I was always bad at thinking of titles. I usually come up with something random like song lyrics or a quote...I don't know how to sum up all the muddled-ness in my head into one Title!

So my last day of classes is December 13. Unfortunately I have a big chemistry final that day. Otherwise I finish everything else scary the week before. Once I am done on that Monday I am thoroughly determined to celebrate! I am just imaginging how I am going to use my days once I am done with school. Oh bliss...

Last night I couldn't sleep. And it wasn't one of those nights where you just can't fall asleep. I couldn't fall asleep because I had a million thoughts whirling around in my head and they all seemed to be pressing against my skull. Tons of worries and issues and I knew I'd never get to sleep. So I grabbed my blankie and went into my parents room. My dad is a pretty light sleeper so I thought that if I whispered "Daaaaad" a few times he would wake up. It was my mom who muttered a groggy, "What?". Then I asked for them to pray for me. They did (of course I cried) and then they let me lay down right in between them. Which was awesome because I haven't done that for over a decade, but after a while it got really hot so I went back to my bed. It was just so amazing to have them understand and love me enough to pray for me at midnight!

One of my big worries was about a French test today. Originally I had a C overall grade in the class. I was so freaked out because I need a C or higher to graduate, and I knew that if I bombed the test and got lower than a C and then got a really low overall grade...well I didn't know what would happen! I wouldn't be able to graduate in December. So it really was one of those tests that would make or break...my whole future. O_O Anyways, I got an 86!! WHOOT! Who says God doesn't answer prayer?? I say "Ha!" in their faces!

Needless to say, there are so many other things that are weighing on my mind. Uuuuuugh...I don't even want to deal with it all. I wish I had a machine that had a sign on it "QUESTIONS" and everyday you could ask any question and get God's answer back.

Oh and thanks to all (2 of you! lame!) who told me which actor your dream spouse would resemble! Yours is cute, Ame! And Madds, he is quite handsome. :) Mine is (dun dun dun dun):

Josh Harnett. :) Yes...anywho.

I watched the movie The Company the other day. It pretty much follows the life of a ballet dancer in a Chicago ballet company. I love dance but not enough to live the kind of life she did...insane. And I really want to see 127 Hours! Not only does it look good but I looooove James Franco. We'll see. Right now Voyage of the Dawn Treader is top on my list. And also Tangled looks so good! Maybe that is how I will go celebrate.